I think I can now safely say that I hate you.  You have ruined me, and you don't care.  I stick up for myself, but you tell me not to be so childish.  I tell you you're wrong, and you tell me to respect you or there will be consequences.  So when I decide to be quiet, you repeat the statement again and again until I shout.  You don't care when I achieve anything, it's a well done 'now where can I pick an argument with you'?  Believe it or not, I get tired of being put down all the time. It is affecting me all the time now, even with the people I really love; even more than you, and more than they know.  Although that's not hard really.  I actually feel nothing for you.  I have tried to love you, or even just like you, but I can't.  Something is stopping me, and I'm glad about that.  I'm becoming more and more sensitive to situations, and more and more I've wanted a knife to end it.  Life would be so much better then.  You wouldn't have to hate me, and I wouldn't have to site here and die on the inside.  Instead, you can focus on your golden boy.  That's all you do anyway.  RIght in front of me you give him money, and say 'well you're not getting any, you don't need it'.  Hello? I go to college in a few months! Not that you'd care though because I'm not the important one.  Nor my OCD.  The fact that I can't actually control it.  But that doesn't matter, because you don't see that.  All you see is a pathetic, fat, lonely lie that doesn't deserve anythign more than being constantly shouted at.  Well. I have made my decision.  You are not having anythign to do with me when I move out.  YOu're just like your parents.  Don't give 2 shits about the eldest child, because the eldest one is so precious.  So, don't expect to be invited to any weddings, or to see any grandchildren you may have.  You don't deserve to.  Just you keep putting on a show so that you can fool everyone.  Well, I know its a fake, and I'll now be dead before my time, all down to you.  I hope you're bloody happy.